Telling my parents

I have been wondering how my parents would react to such a surprise since for them everything has to be planned and thought through a million times. And this kid is anything but planned. We called them on Christmas Eve to wish them a Merry Christmas. They complained that Christmas was quite lonely for them with no-one being around. So I told them that next year, they will not celebrate alone but with their grandchild. My mom cried tears of joy and I have not seen a smile as big on my dad's face in years! This was truly a Christmas surprise for them!

Since then they are completely zen about the child. While I am worried as hell how to feed the child once my contract runs out next year and I may end up without a job for a while, all I hear from them is "Don't worry, everything will be alright!". I hope they are right.

The first ultrasound

Right before the Christmas break I had my first ultrasound to see if I am really pregnant, how many there are and if the baby is where it is supposed to be and to get a more precise prediction of when the baby will be due (August 8). Everything seemed normal. My OB/GYN then explained to that we are going to check the heart rate now. She explained to me that at this stage the heart is only developing so I shouldn't be worried if nothing can be heard or if we hear only intermittent heartbeats. 

Then she turned on the microphone and the heart was beating with an intensity that even left my doctor wowed! 

BOOM! - BOOM! - BOOM! - BOOM! - BOOM! - BOOM!

I guess someone is determined to live. A very happy moment! For now everything seems to go smooth.

Meeting the inlaws

My boyfriend and I had planned to travel to his home town to meet his family for a long time. I was quite nervous about the visit because we definitely had not planned the "this is my girlfriend, and by the way she's pregnant"-introduction. For me, the worst-case scenario of being introduced. 

We first went to his grandmother's for one night. My boyfriend's granny received me with open arms and was very sweet to me. She actually asked him, if I was pregnant after a few hours, and he told her yes. Later I found out she is a trained midwife, so there was no way to fool her. It was not a big deal for her. 

Next we went to his grandfather's place. This is the place where his family comes from and most of his relatives still live there. There I met his father for the first time, who is a really cool, relaxed man, and now I know where my boyfriend has his calm and relaxed personality from. His relatives were all very friendly and sweet to me. We didn't tell anybody about my expectant status though.

Finally we went to his home town, and stayed in the house where he grew up in and his parents and one of his sisters with his nephews still live. His mom welcomed me with open arms and during my first lunch she was very interested in my family and me. 

Later at dinner my boyfriend dropped the bomb by telling his parents that they are going to have a white grandchild. His father asked what our plans are now, and his mom asked when we are getting married. But in the end, it seemed not such a big deal. In the next few days his mom gave me some pregnancy tips and two books about pregnancy and what we'll need for the baby. She repeatedly told my boyfriend to take good care of me, and move in with me so that he can care for me better. 

At one point, when we were alone, she confessed to me that she was very worried about her son when he decided to move to the big city, because she feared he may develop vices or not be able to make anything of his life. But now that she met me, she is not worried about him anymore. 

To me, this is the nicest compliment a mother-in-law-to-be can make. 

My first visit to the OB/GYN

Coming from Germany, where everything is double and triple-checked and proofed I had a very different first visit to my OB/GYN in the Philippines. 

This is how our visit went:

OB: What can I do for you?

Me: I'm pregnant, I guess...

OB: [Shouting out in joy] FINALLY! (as if we've been trying to become pregnant for years, when in fact only 5 months ago I told her we had no plans to have a baby anytime soon).

OB: When was the first day of your last menstruation?

Me: October 30

OB: Is your cycle regular?

ME: More or less.

OB: Did you do a pregnancy test?

ME: Two, and both came out positive.

OB: Then you're definitely pregnant. Congratulations!

I would expect a blood test or at least another urine test at this point to confirm the pregnancy - but no, that was it.

My estimated date of delivery was calculated (August 7), I was given my pregnancy book, prescribed folic acid and vitamins, advised to drink two glasses of milk a day, got an appointment for ultrasound next week and then I was dismissed.

I brought my boyfriend to the OB/GYN because I expected further questions about the health history of our families, any genetic abnormalities in our families, etc. as it is routine in my country. But nothing of that. 

I guess the Filipino attitude to dealing with pregnancy is: Relax, everything will be alright, and if not, we'll deal with it when we find out (i.e. the latest, when the baby is out). 

Whereas the German attitude is more of: We need to rule out all eventualities for abnormalities, problems, risks and potential illnesses, and then you may relax about having a healthy child. 

In fact, I just read, that in Germany 80% of all pregnancies are at first declared "high-risk-pregnancy" which entitles the mother to more visits to the OB/GYN or midwife, but some of them are downgraded to "normal" after a few months.

OMG, I'm pregnant!

I am a German working in the Philippines. Almost year ago I met my wonderful boyfriend with whom I can imagine a common future and settle in the Philippines - but then you never know what life has in mind for you.

A few days ago I found out I was pregnant. It was not exactly planned but not totally unwanted either. We had just hoped for more time together before we start the adventure of founding a family. We blame it on Yolanda and the stress in its aftermath that caused my cycle to do it's own thing resulting in me being fertile when I wasn't supposed to be. We also blame the fertile atmosphere at the office that seemingly causes every woman working there to become pregnant.

After the first minutes of shock when I told him, my boyfriend turned into the most supportive father-to-be I could wish for.

My pregnancy triggered me to start this blog. I want to write about my experiences here as a becoming mom.

I hope I will have the discipline to continue this blog regularly.